She let out some sort of yelp and sank to her knees. Her shoulders gyrated as she tried to suppress her laughter. All I could do was stand there and wait, or else I’d track all this mess through my room.“Eeh eeh eeh eeh eeh eeh eeh eeh eeh eeh eeh eeh eeh eeh!” she went, for about a minute.“If you’re quite finished, I’d like to trouble you for another towel.”She got up and avoided eye contact as she opened the door and retrieved another towel from her service trolley.“How come you know Kim Kardashian? Give me jacket, I put it on this towel.”“Well, why wouldn’t I? Thank you.”“Because you are British man, who drinks tea and reads books! And I understand the joke about the audition, you know. That is a mean joke. Shirt?”I have no compunctions about taking off my dress shirt in front of women. There’s another shirt underneath, after all. Oh yes, even when it’s forty-two degrees out!“You seemed to think it was funny anyway,” I said, as I went down the row of buttons. She had a large towel. Promise me right here and now that you will never have sex with another man. Please promise me, right now. I have to hear it from you." Okay, Honey, I promise. I never wanted another man. You're all the man I'll ever want and ever need. Please believe me. God, Honey you scared me so much. It's only you I want and only you I love."Ted, something's wrong. I can feel it. You almost had a stroke in your sleep. Please talk to me. I need to know what happened to you, what caused this delusion." It was me wondering about you having sex with someone else. In the stories I read it seems to be a turn on for some guys but I'm not going to share you with anyone." You never have to worry Ted. You're all the man I ever want. You have to understand that every woman gets hit on but it's how they react that counts. You know I don't like seeing men grope women and I sure the hell aren't letting them grope me. Let me finish getting dressed. We have to meet Bob and Sue. You better go put on another.
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